A template for telling someone you’ve unfollowed them on Twitter

Flying birds

Dear @you,

You may have noticed I unfollowed you on Twitter.

Don’t be mad. Don’t send me an email, text or message on Facebook. It wasn’t personal at all. I unfollowed you on Twitter. It’s that simple, and you don’t have to be upset about it. Let me tell you why:

  1. It’s only Twitter. Read that out loud. Good, now read it again. Odds are, since we’re actually friends, I’m going to communicate with you in real life sometime soon.
  2. Remember that my Twitter account is my Twitter account and I should enjoy using it. Your tweets probably started to infringe on my joy of using the service, so I unfollowed you to make my Twitter stream something enjoyable for me. Please don’t let this insult you. In reality, what should offend you is if I kept following you even though I absolutely despise what you’re saying.
  3. Just because I’m not following on Twitter doesn’t mean I don’t like you as a person. I just may not fully appreciate how you’re tweeting this week. If you really want me to see a specific link, picture or video feel free to text me and I’ll check it out.
  4. I may follow you again. My tastes change all the time. Sometimes, I do get on a I-want-every-quote-Taylor-Swift-ever-said kick and you are the best means to that end.

Thank you so much for the tweets while I’ve followed you. Your insight into various things has been very entertaining and I still have plenty of your clever quips favorited. I also sincerely hope that (insert artist, celebrity, professional athlete name) retweets / follows you soon.

Yours in Twitter,

My Name

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